Bridge the Gap Between You and Your Teen This Mother’s Day

Quite possibly the BEST Mother’s Day Gift that you can get this year is a relationship with your teen that endures all battles.

I’m not referring to a picture-perfect relationship where no one argues and your teen’s room is always spotless, because let’s be honest – that isn’t reality … 

I’m talking about a REAL bond that involves some conflict, but at the end of the day you know it will always turn back to the strong, foundational relationship that you and your teen have built together.

Regardless of how messy your relationship might be with your son or daughter right now, I want to encourage you that there is a way to build that foundation.

Our actions and reactions heavily impact how much our teens trust us to open up with us and let their guard down. If we are constantly lecturing or criticizing their decisions, it won’t feel good for them to come to us.

This Mother’s Day season, I want to encourage you to flip the script and release the expectation of what your family will provide for you – and rather, find a fun way to create an opportunity to reconnect with your teen. 

Mother's Day Prep Guide

Our Teens Don’t Want To Be “Managed”

If the first and last thing your teen hears from you each day is what they DIDN’T do right, it’s going to be very difficult for them to trust you. After all, it begins to feel like you are always out to “get” them. 

Surprise your teen this week without the constant reminders to do their chores, pack their lunch, or not forget their soccer gear. Give them the opportunity to remember to do these things and see where they may pleasantly surprise you.

The subtle change to allow your teen the chance to remember what they need to do on their own is not only giving them the independence they are craving, but it may also give you the opportunity to recognize and praise them for all that they DO remember to do.

It’s Almost Always A Bumpy Ride – But This Can Help

Some teen-mom relationships are bumpier than others, but at the end of the day – we all know there will be bumps along the way. This ONE thing will make all the difference.

Listen. 

When our teens come to us with a hard scenario that came up with a friend or the frustration they feel about their teacher’s grading strategy, giving feedback is not what they are looking for. 

It’s okay for us to simply say “wow that sounds really hard, I’m sorry you’re going through that.” 

By removing any advice or opinion, we actually are encouraging them to share more and creating the safest place for our teens to come when they are feeling let down.

Set The Example Of What A Peaceful Relationship Can Look Like

Don’t forget that conflict takes two to tango and since you are the adult – it is your responsibility to be the example of peace. 

If a conversation is getting heated, it’s okay to pause and walk away. Give your teen (and yourself) space to calm down. 

If your teen says something hurtful to you – there is no benefit to you firing back. Use a gentle phrase like “I’m going to walk away and give us both space to think about this” and then do just that. 

When it comes to our relationship with the children we raised who are now SO close to adulthood – a lot of emotions are involved.

Give yourself, and your teen, grace through these tricky years and remember that you always have the opportunity to be the person your teen trusts most. Show them what trust and respect looks like and watch the magic happen. 

And if you’re looking for a fun way to set a solid foundation to celebrate your family – download our Mother’s Day Prep Guide, completely free right here!

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